we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows