i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Randomize
