she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize