Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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