Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Randomize