I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
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Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
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It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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