That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize