'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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