Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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