She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
