please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
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