i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize