I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
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