hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
