idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi