Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now

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(845): i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now http://tfl.nu/aait

Replies (14) Good night (1087) Bad night (1568)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.

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(201): If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now. http://tfl.nu/xijf

Replies (7) Good night (2894) Bad night (692)
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(813): View more from Florida

he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up

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(813): he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up http://tfl.nu/iuqn

Replies (8) Good night (2814) Bad night (1067)
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(314): View more from Missouri

I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.

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(314): I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it. http://tfl.nu/3rlt

Replies (12) Good night (918) Bad night (5691)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C

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(401): so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C http://tfl.nu/zt1d

Replies (12) Good night (3907) Bad night (1003)
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(714): View more from California

Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.

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(714): Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex. http://tfl.nu/8q2z

Replies (9) Good night (904) Bad night (4192)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?

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(304): Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps? http://tfl.nu/jolf

Replies (13) Good night (4263) Bad night (994)
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(636): View more from Missouri

Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.

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(636): Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time. http://tfl.nu/mfto

Replies (6) Good night (2359) Bad night (1305)
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(713): View more from Texas

Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me

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(713): Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me http://tfl.nu/9ft0

Replies (4) Good night (779) Bad night (1716)
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(209): View more from California

Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.

(209): View more from California

And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.

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(209): Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012. (209): And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas. http://tfl.nu/yl8f

Replies (15) Good night (1811) Bad night (694)
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(309): View more from Illinois

Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.

(1-309): View more from Illinois

I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.

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(309): Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment. (1-309): I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college. http://tfl.nu/zbsh

Replies (7) Good night (1201) Bad night (542)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.

(732): View more from New Jersey

you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.

(732): View more from New Jersey

IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.

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(732): You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home. (732): you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato. (732): IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME. http://tfl.nu/cjpu

Replies (6) Good night (1325) Bad night (599)
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(714): View more from California

You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.

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(714): You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid. http://tfl.nu/jhks

Replies (5) Good night (479) Bad night (886)
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(561): View more from Florida

Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina

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(561): Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina http://tfl.nu/9ymq

Replies (11) Good night (480) Bad night (769)
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(805): View more from California

How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?

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(805): How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution? http://tfl.nu/e70o

Replies (5) Good night (452) Bad night (265)

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