I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
