Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
