why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
