No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize