Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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