He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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