i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
