i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize