make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize