Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
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