Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize
