we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
