I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize