Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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