i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
it's great music for shaving your balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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