I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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