Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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