You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
He kissed a someone with a penis
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me