take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
