And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize