I'm lost and stupid without you.
please come you make the beer taste better
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
no you cant smoke seaweed
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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