We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I just want nice things and good sex
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
