Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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