I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
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