if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
