and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
high people should be assigned attendants
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
