During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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