hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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