it wasn't lemon gatorade
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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