lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
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I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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