party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
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There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
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I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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