I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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