I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
