Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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